Day 3

I made it through last night. Dinner party at my house went great. One person brought alcohol and had 2 drinks. Everyone seemed to have fun. And so did I.

Today will be a challange maybe. I'm alone at home. Was invited to the lake but that will be drinking time so can't do that. Plan to stay home and get some stuff done. Feeling ok so far but it's only 6 AM.

 

Time to try again

Day 2. Trying this again. And again till I get it right. I have to lay low and stay away from friends who are drinking or who will drink with me despite knowing my situation. It's not their responsibility but mine. However I get such mixed messages. Asking me to go and waving the waiter over then texting me the next day about how I have no self control. It's true though. When it comes to alcohol I have no control at all.

Three days alone this weekend. Confused on how to stay busy but praying for strength. I can't hide behind the excuse, I can't bury myself in social activities because I will drink, too much time alone is not good for me...But I have done it before and can do it again. I have non drinking friends, I have my family.

God give me the strength to do this.

time

how time changes things. drinking again. more in control now yet i have that nagging guilt about it. i have an idea of how life should be and work to accomplish that i suppose. the drinks are random bringing relief at times and nothing at time.